INTERIOR – AFTERNOON. DOG IN THE POND. Sarah is upset about the recent injury to her father but Craig is keen to celebrate the end of the first exam.CRAIG: Here’s to exams. One down….
JOHN PAUL: Far too many to go!(Craig and John Paul chink bottles and drink.)
JAKE: Shouldn’t you wait till you finish all your exams before you start celebrating?
CRAIG: You know for a minute there, I was happy, Jake. Why do you have to go and ruin my moment?
SARAHYeh, well maybe there’s more important things than exams.
JAKE: Yeh, that’s exactly what I keep trying to tell Nancy.
CRAIG: See the old reverse psychology. Say they don’t matter that much in case you get a D.
SARAH: Or say they don’t matter cos your dad’s recovering after nearly being killed.
CRAIG: And…. and…. and that. Sorry.(John Paul looks embarrassed.)
INTERIOR – AFTERNOON. DOG IN THE POND. Craig is on the pool table and Jake is collecting glasses from around the friends.
JAKE: Nancy not coming in?
SARAH: Oh, she’s still got her head in her books.
JAKE: Did she say how the exam went for her?
HANNAH: Don’t ask. You should have seen her before. It was like her whole world had ended.
JOHN PAUL: What, from one exam?
CRAIG: Yeh, well, after the year she’s had she’s probably got the Samaritans on speed dial.
JAKE: Oy!
CRAIG: Which is why – we should all be looking out for her. All of us.
SARAH: Well shall we go over there now?
CRAIG: No, I…. I just got the beers in.
HANNAH: So what was it that first attracted you to the sensitive Craig Dean?(Craig pots a ball and crows “woo!”)
JOHN PAUL: His modesty.
HANNAH: Yeh, I just can’t believe it – I just think next month we’ll be out of that door for good.
SARAH: Leeds uni here I come.
CRAIG: Don’t hide your excitement on your boyfriend’s account.
SARAH: Says the boyfriend who can’t stop going on about male to female ratio at Trinity.
CRAIG: It is ridiculous. You know, five to one. That’s pretty impressive. If… if you were single, that is, which I for one am definitely not.
JOHN PAUL: I’m going to be staying here anyway.
HANNAH: What?
SARAH: What you thinking of going to HCC?
JOHN PAUL: Rent’s cheaper, isn’t it?
HANNAH: Yeh, really good idea, actually.
CRAIG: Is it?
HANNAH: Yeh, I mean why go somewhere where you don’t know anyone. When everything you need’s right here.
JOHN PAUL: Er, well you know it’s not…. it’s not set in stone or anything (Spike comes in to start his DJ shift and comes over to the gang.)
SPIKE: You know you lot wanna stop studying, otherwise you’re gonna get student burn-out.(Craig grimaces and gets up to take another shot.)
JOHN PAUL: Well, you know what they say - all work and no play….
SPIKE: Depends what you’re playing. (Leans over to kiss John Paul on the mouth. Hannah and Craig both react.)
Mmm, you ta
ste of beer. Well, I’ll maybe come back later after I’ve built up a thirst, yeh?(John Paul nods. Craig misses his shot on the pool table.) 
JOHN PAUL: My shot.(Goes up to the table and lines up what is clearly a successful shot.)They think it’s all over.
HANNAH: It is now.INTERIOR – AFTERNOON. DOG IN THE POND – AT THE BAR
JAKE: Is that it? (referring to drinks)
HANNAH: I’m just getting a round in. Do you want one?
SPIKE: Yeh, I’ll have a bottle of lager, cheers.
HANNAH: One more lager it is, then, Dean.
JAKE: No problem.(Jake goes to get drink. Spike and Hannah stand awkwardly.)
SPIKE: Wasting your time, Hannah.
HANNAH: What?
SPIKE: You know, it’s never gonna happen, not in this lifetime.
HANNAH: Seriously, I don’t know what you’re talking about.
SPIKE: When’s it gonna sink in? You’re not his type.
HANNAH: What? You still think that I’m into John Paul?
SPIKE: Yeh, and where would I get that impression? Wait a minute, that’s cos you don’t leave him alone.
HANNAHActually, I’m well over him.
SPIKEHannah, you’re like an embarrassing rash that just won’t go away.
INTERIOR – AFTERNOON. DOG IN THE POND – ON THE CORNER SEATS
SARAH: You just start to think, like, what was the last thing I said to him? When was the last time I told him I love him?
CRAIG: He knows you love him.
SARAH: How does anybody know if you don’t tell them?(John Paul looks thoughtful about this line.)
INTERIOR – AFTERNOON. DOG IN THE POND – BACK AT THE BAR
HANNAH: Thanks. (for her change)
SPIKE: Look, I’m not trying to mark my territory or anything, Hannah. I’m just trying to do you a favour.
HANNAH: You think you know everything, don’t you?
SPIKE: No.
HANNAH: No, cos you don’t. You don’t know anything.
SPIKE: This is for the drink, Hannah.
HANNAH: Look, I think that you’ll find it’s John Paul that can’t let go.
SPIKE: Hey, just keep telling yourself that.
HANNAH: Oh, I’m not talking about me. I’m talking about Craig. He’s in love with him. Oh, didn’t you know that one?(Spike clearly didn’t.)
INTERIOR – AFTERNOON. DOG IN THE POND – ON THE CORNER SEATS Spike is chatting to a customer about his playlist. It could be seen as over-friendly.
CRAIG: He’s not exactly subtle, is he?
SARAH: What, they’re just talking.
HANNAH: More like flirting.
JOHN PAUL: Yeh, cos my heart’s just burning with jealousy.
HANNAH: Really? I heard that if you’re not jealous you’re not actually in love.
JOHN PAUL: Are you trying to tell me how I feel?
SARAH: Oh ig:nore her, she’s probably been listening to James Blunt again.
HANNAH: How could you possibly ignore me, when I’m like a bad rash that won’t go away.
JOHN PAUL: What? Right, OK, on that note I’ll, er, get a round in, shall I?
SARAH: I’ll give you a hand.
CRAIG: So, er, what exactly did Spike say to you?
INTERIOR – AFTERNOON. DOG IN THE POND – AT THE BAR. Craig can’t stop staring at Spike’s friendly manner with customers.CRAIGHe needs to tone it down.
SARAH: Oh, right, making it uncomfortable for you, is he?
JAKE: Yeh.
CRAIG: Well, he’s making John Paul feel uncomfortable.
JAKE: Isn’t there somewhere else they could go that’s more…. gay?
SARAH: Somewhere where they prance around singing YMCA?
JAKE: Yeh.(Craig moves swiftly and cockily over to Spike’s decks and spins his vinyl.)
CRAIG: What is it, eh? An attention thing?
SPIKE: I’m sorry?
CRAIG: Are you just, er, determined to make a big impression on everybody.
SPIKE: Let me guess who you’ve been talking to.
CRAIG: Hannah has been on the scene a lot longer than you have.
SPIKE: Yeh, well I’ve just put her right on a few things.
CRAIG: No, no, no, you’re out of order.
SPIKE: You finished? Cos I’ve got to get back to work.
CRAIG: Well why don’t you get your mate to help you.
SPIKE: You got a problem with me?
CRAIG: Yeh, I’m looking out for John Paul.
SPIKE: Well, he’s a big boy. He can take care of himself.
JOHN PAUL: What’s going on?
SPIKE: Nothing.
JOHN PAUL: I’m not stupid. I know sommat’s going on. Who’s gonna tell me what it is?
SPIKE: I’m sorry, you think we’re keeping something from you? Welcome to my world.
INTERIOR – AFTERNOON. DOG IN THE POND – IN THE CORNER SEATS AND THEN OVER BY SPIKE’S DECKS. Craig is rolling pool balls, obviously waiting to play with John
Paul….SARAH: Look, Hannah, I seriously don’t think Spike means to be funny with you. You know, he’s just, he’s just…. Spike.
JOHN PAUL: I just wanna know what I’ve done wrong, that’s all.
SPIKE: Seeing as we’re short for time, clue number one – your best mate. Clue two – Craig. And number three – you’re in love with him.
JOHN PAUL: What?
SPIKE: Yeh, well you know there’s no rings here, so…
JOHN PAUL: Whoa, whoa, whoa, who told you that?
SPIKE: Little Miss Lapdog – what do you call her, Hannah? I told her to go haunt somebody else and she, she comes back with this nugget of information.
JOHN PAUL: It’s not what you think.
SPIKE: I don’t want the details, mate.
JOHN PAUL: All right, OK, I thought I was in love with him.
SPIKE: Oh, I see, so it was just some schoolboy crush?
JOHN PAUL: Yeh. Yeh, I… look, I wanted him and he didn’t wanna know.
SPIKE: You see, that’s the problem with straight men, they can be so inconsiderate.
JOHN PAUL: I’m just trying to let you know what’s going on. Why are you being so difficult?
SPIKE: I want you to be up front with you.
JOHN PAUL: Right, you want up front? I’ve never felt like this about anyone before. How’s that for up front?
SPIKE: That’s a bit serious. I don’t do serious.
JOHN PAUL: But you do jealous, though, don’t you? Spike! Spike!(Spike is pushing his headphones onto his ears to drown out John Paul’s presence. John Paul slings himself round the decks and slides the volume off. Craig stops rolling his balls and looks over. Spike squares up to John Paul.)
SPIKE: You do that again and I’ll floor you. (A moment of tension. Then Spike pulls young McQueen’s head into his for a public snog. Sarah and Hannah look embarrassed. Craig stares and then looks down.)
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